i have been in the library before the start of school, plotted, schemed, twisted myself into a pretzel and flowered the knot growing like a peach in my stomach. i drew in from old friends their thoughts of the future- those long awaited adventures in iceland, created a brat pack, created a dream team, loved someone except i did not love him, kissed and kissed and drove across mountain ranges at sunset, got lost in school and in my heart.
i teared to the rhythm of eloquent lectures- felt my brain contract and release, drained countless cups of 7$ coffee, went to club meetings with the air so dense, i swore for the first time in a long time, went to optional lectures at night, crossed train tracks, crossed train tracks while drunk, watched a play like it was a movie, watched a modern dance recital like it was a comedy, explored gallery openings, witnessed the physical pull of a good book, danced to jazz music, saw the blue of cigarette smoke.
got sick, recovered, was a victim to a fire alarm, rearranged sandwiches, felt my heart swell, held my breathe, cried, wrote, sang, slept, dreamt and understood certain dark things.
